Humans are a social animal, and we have ‘evolved’ to become what we are. In this evolution process, we developed some traits which helped us survive in the past. One of the very important factor to survive for our biological ancestors was to co-operate with fellow beings. Which suggests that it was important for our ancestors to be liked by the others. This characteristic is still present in humans. We are all (almost) always trying to be ‘nice’ to others even and in that process, we put a mask on our true feelings and hide the true us from the world. We just make something up, say something which makes others like us even if that is not true, or that is not what the other person should hear. Instead of telling the truth, we wear our masks and be ‘nice’ to them, we deny them their right to truth. We deny them an opportunity to truly know us, understand us.
Think about this, how many people really know you? I mean like really really know. We are so good at masking our true self. We are never truly honest with anyone. In the process of being ‘nice’, we actually convince ourselves also that we are the person we try to be. We are even not completely honest with ourselves. We have convinced ourselves so many times to save us from accepting that maybe we are not what we think we are, we are probably not as good as we thought.

These masks hide us, from us. It is important that first we realise that they exist, and then to try to remove these masks slowly, one by one, first for ourselves, then for the close ones, and then for others. These masks have helped us in believing that we are good, and since we are good, people like us. And while removing these masks, people may not like us, and more dangerously, we may not like ourselves. It may be very unsettling, very uncomfortable, but it would be the truth and we all have right to truth.

Trying to fit in the world